In Every Issue: The Lighter Side of Health Care
I love my master. Wait. Let me start over. Master is an inappropriate term on so many levels, so I’ll put it this way: I have great admiration for that guy who feeds me three times a day and pitches me a few treats in between and had the foresight to provide for me three … Read more
Has a quick trip through the grocery store ever been unnecessarily extended by 30 or 40 precious seconds because some ill-mannered, impolite and impudent fellow shopper was clogging up the traffic traveling through an aisle by – God forbid – reading the fine print on a bag of tortilla chips, a cup of yogurt or … Read more
“Amy, I’m telling you right now that you can’t use contacts. You’re going to need bifocals and use them for a while before we can talk about contacts,” Dr. Anon said, leaving me feeling like an 8-year-old. Well, I can behave like an 8-year-old. “I don’t want bifocals. I can read just fine,” I said, … Read more
“Hey, you think she’s single?” my father asked as the beautiful nurse breezed past. “DAD!” I hissed, “Remember what we talked about, please. I’m begging you. Do. Not. Flirt.” In a put-on, aged voice he creaked, “Why no, honey. I don’t remember. I’m just an old man. You can’t expect me to remember everything.” The … Read more
When I was first diagnosed with cancer, I made the only rational decision anyone with this diagnosis could make. I inundated myself with more information than the average human brain could possibly absorb. Knowledge is power, right? Right? My bookshelves bow under the weight of books covering an impossible breadth of cancer-related minutiae, both scientific … Read more
“I … I think I have hyperthyroidism.” “What? Why?” “Or I might have Supraventricular Tachycardia.” “Supercali … what? What are you talking about?” “Google says my symptoms, heart palpitations and shaking could be…” “You also have a hangover and haven’t had anything but coffee today. You’re probably just dehydrated.” “Oh, yes. WebMD symptom checker says … Read more